Tuesday, 12 May 2015

GUEST POST: Inter-tribal marriage wahala.

Hello Pam, how are you doing today? I am a huge ghost reader, sorry I really loved yesterday's post and that is the reason why I'm sending this. For the record, you are doing a great job. Keep it up.

This tribal stuff is somehow coming to bite me in my back soonest. I was born and brought up in a family with both of my parents from different tribes, so imagine my shock when the specifically listed tribes which I and my siblings shouldn't dare have a relationship with.

I've tried to reason with them but they have remained adamant and have sworn to not attend anybody's wedding if we go against them. But, when I asked them if I can marry a white man, they replied in the positive.

The main issue is that, I have never been in a relationship with any of the approved tribes. They don't seem to appeal to me. One way or another, I happen to find myself in a relationship with the unapproved tribes. Is this coincidence or is God just trying to tell me something. I have turned down so many proposals cos of this tribal thing but coincidental I am tied to them somehow. I hope and pray but it seems it doesn't work. None of the approved tribes people ever comes my way, instead, the unapproved tribes comes alot.

Few months ago, I happen to sluggishly drag myself into dating someone who is also from the unapproved tribe. I just started dating this really cool person for dating sake, but along the line, I fell really inlove. I am love-tied to this person and as recently, we've started talking marriage. But, my fear is, how will I present this person to my parents without them throwing tantrums? I really don't know what to do now, and I am tired of waiting for the approved tribes to come my way, and I really think that this person is the "ONE".

Please, my fellow crib-mates, what do I do? How do I approach my stubborn parents with this matter now? And yes, my siblings are having the same issue too, so I'm not the only one suffering and smiling. My parents just keep asking us when will we introduce our partners to them. Which partner? Partner fire. I'm so pissed at how parents can frustrate their kids. WTF. Please, you people should help me out here because I'm seriously considering eloping from home. And Pam please say something oo, don't just read comments on this one.

****Hmmmm, that was a heavy breath out. In Stella's voice I say, FIX THIS JESUS. My dear, please pray about it again and confront them with the idea once more. If your parents have anybody they really respect and listen to, like a man of God or an elderly person, you can approach the person and table the matter to him/her. This person may also be in the best position to talk to your parents and make them see reasons why they shouldn't discriminate. Please and please, DO NOT ELOPE. Let me just assume that you are joking about the elope stuff. I just tire for here. Please Pamscribers, let's help our poster out. ****


  1. Mehn...ele gidi go (this is a strong one)
    Mehn...if they fail to see reasons with u maybe u should then do the big one #elope....omg I didn't say.... that but u people should just talk things over with them they will understand if the refuse tell them you are four months pregnant for the man ...even if u are not.


  2. You and your siblings should sit them down and make them see reasons. That's what me and my sisters do when our parents are being stubborn

  3. When God says yes, who can say no? When God is involved, it will turn out well. Keep praying and keep talking to them about it. Please, do not elope!

  4. You guys should dialogue with your parents and make them see reason but if they dn't, just follow your hrt, whatever will be will be with or without anyone

  5. Pray about it, if it's God's will for you to marry him, no Jupiter can stop that. Somehow for some parents sha.
    You can go ahead with the wedding if you are truly convinced he is the one.


  6. Am passing through the same thing dear, it is something that involves prayers and patience. Don't force it. Yours is even tribe mine we are both Igbos but just from different states. Been on it for over a year now. It takes time but your love for each other will conquer..
    Please do not elope dear, its not an option..

  7. Eyaaaaaa I really feel for this person.

    At times I wonder how terrible the experience some parents had that makes them make this kinda decision for us!!! They have to hear noni. speak with people that can talk to them cos your happiness matters in marriage. It's a long life academy!!!


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